Have you ever bought a live music album?
I avoid them, in most cases. Yes, I know there are exceptional ones, like ‘The Who – Live at Leeds’, but in the main, live albums are rubbish. You get all your favourite songs, but sung slightly out of tune, and with a background noise of screaming idiots. Great when you are there watching, but rubbish on a CD.
As a result, I feel duty bound to advise Radio 1 that they really need to put a lid on their ‘Big Weekend’. The ‘Big Weekend’ being a free music festival, that replaced the old and creaky roadshows that used to turn up at a seaside resort near you. Places like the boating lake, Cleethorpes. The Big Weekend is, it must be said, a giant step up from Dave Lee Travis arriving in a big caravan on a random beach in Newquay, with Smiley Miley giving out goodie bags. It still feels the need, mind, to visit places like Swindon, Maidstone, Bangor (Wales), and this year, the music capital of the UK (or not) Carlisle.
I should emphasise this important fact, incidentally. The festival itself is actually very good. This year, the line up included the Foo Fighters and Lady Gaga. Ellie Goulding put on an excellent performance. The acts are top notch, and if you got a ticket you are very lucky.
My problem, then isn’t the festival. It’s the fact that for the entire month either side of it, Radio 1 have to go on about it. Constantly. Chris Moyles presents his show for a week from Carlisle. The Chart Show takes every opportunity to play a poor, out of tune live version of a song in the charts. Edith Bowman has to mention it in every second sentence. For crikey sake, after the event they go on about how bloody magnificent it was, and how everyone loved it, and how wonderful Radio 1 are for bringing us this incredible event. Here’s another live song from the big weekend, out of tune and inaudible for the screaming crowd but aren’t you lucky to be listening blah blah blah.
Well, I’m not lucky. I’m bored of it. I commend you, Radio 1, for bringing live music to the masses but there really is no need to be so self-bloody-righteous about it. In fact, you made me listen to Chris Evans and Nick Hancock on Stray FM last week. Stray FM! I officially became to old to listen to Radio 1. And, for this, I will never forgive you. Now, take your big weekend and deposit it in a dark pit until next year.